A Moving Experience

On Monday, 4 September I moved from Dallas, TX to Toronto, ON, Canada to begin my PhD in Art History at the University of Toronto. This is a fantastic school and incredible program and really the best place for me; however, a move like this is also full of doubts, anxiety, fears, and lonliness. I left behind all of my friends and family to move to a (foreign) city where I know no one. Thankfully, through a friend of a friend I have a place to stay temporarily and someone who has taken great care of me and getting me settled in a new city. I still need to find a permanent place to live, though, and the two places I have looked at so far have are not going to work out. I am waiting to hear back from two others and am also applying to one of the dorms on campus. The dorm might be the best deal for me right now as I get used to the new city and find a better place to live for my remaining time here.

This is my first weekend here and the absense of my normal weekend routine is definitly felt. I longed for the time when I wouldn't have that routine, but now that it is gone I do miss it and feel rather lost without it. I need to find a new structure and routine to become accustomed to. Once classes start on Monday I am sure I will find it as then I will have loads of work to do to fill the idle hours. Once classes start I will also meet more people and hopefully develop some friendships that will serve me well here.

When I am busy I don't think about missing my friends and family so much but when I have little to do it seems like they are all that I think about. The lack of their presense in my daily life is greatly felt, even though, email and IM chats make up for a lot. In some ways I don't feel so far away because in many ways we can be in constant contact, but its the ability to see someone at a moment's notice that is so different. No longer can I meet my best friend for coffee or just to watch a movie. I know the relationship is still there, and will be for a very long time, but its the daily presense in my life that I miss. Once my time here is filled with schoolwork I won't have as much time to dwell on what I am lacking, and I hope I will develop some friendships that will help ease the loneliness. I need to make the most of this new adventure and phase of my life and not look back on it with any regrets.